INTJ β The Architect
INTJs are attracted to intelligence, competence, and directness. They have no patience for games or ambiguity β if you like them, say so clearly.
β
Do this
Bring up a complex idea and have a real opinion about it. Be honest, even bluntly. Show you're capable and self-sufficient.
β Avoid this
Playing hard to get, excessive small talk, or needing constant validation. They'll conclude you're not worth the effort.
INTP β The Logician
INTPs are wooed by wit and ideas. They're often oblivious to flirting β make your interest clear logically, not with hints they'll analyze and dismiss.
β
Do this
Debate something you both find interesting. Accept their corrections graciously. Show curiosity about their niche interests.
β Avoid this
Emotional ultimatums, rushing them to decide, or being offended when they disappear into their own head for hours.
ENTJ β The Commander
ENTJs are attracted to ambition and self-assurance. They respect people who have direction and hold their own β don't be a pushover.
β
Do this
Share your goals and be decisive. Push back thoughtfully when you disagree β ENTJs find intellectual friction attractive.
β Avoid this
Being indecisive, passive, or needing them to carry all the emotional weight. They'll lose respect fast.
ENTP β The Debater
ENTPs are attracted to people who keep up mentally and don't take themselves too seriously. Banter is foreplay for ENTPs.
β
Do this
Debate them playfully and don't concede just to please them. Match their energy. Be willing to explore unconventional ideas.
β Avoid this
Getting offended by their devil's advocate arguments, or demanding they commit to plans weeks in advance.
INFJ β The Advocate
INFJs are deeply selective and slow to open up. They're drawn to depth, sincerity, and people who share their values β not just surface charm.
β
Do this
Listen deeply and remember details they mentioned weeks ago. Share your genuine self gradually. Ask about their inner world, not just their day.
β Avoid this
Being inconsistent, rushing emotional intimacy, or pushing past their limits. INFJs close doors that don't reopen.
INFP β The Mediator
INFPs fall for people who truly see them β not who they appear to be, but who they actually are beneath the quiet exterior.
β
Do this
Show genuine interest in their creative work or values. Small, thoughtful gestures beat grand shows. Make them feel safe being weird.
β Avoid this
Being dismissive of their feelings, making cold logical arguments when they need empathy, or making them feel judged.
ENFJ β The Protagonist
ENFJs are drawn to people who appreciate their giving nature AND reciprocate. They want a partner, not a project.
β
Do this
Be openly appreciative of what they do for you. Show interest in people around you β ENFJs notice how you treat others. Have a sense of purpose.
β Avoid this
Taking their care for granted, being emotionally unavailable, or treating their relationship investments as burdens.
ENFP β The Campaigner
ENFPs are attracted to authenticity and enthusiasm. They want someone who's excited about life β and excited about them.
β
Do this
Be spontaneous and genuinely enthusiastic. Tell them exactly why you find them interesting. Try something new together on the first date.
β Avoid this
Rigid schedules, emotional unavailability, or dismissing their ideas as impractical. They need room to dream out loud.
ISTJ β The Logistician
ISTJs value reliability above all. They're skeptical of charm β what wins them over is demonstrating that you mean what you say.
β
Do this
Be on time, follow through on plans, and be consistent over weeks β not just one impressive date. Respect their routine and commitments.
β Avoid this
Last-minute cancellations, flakiness, or expecting them to drop their existing plans for you.
ISFJ β The Defender
ISFJs notice and remember everything you say. They're attracted to people who feel safe, warm, and genuinely caring.
β
Do this
Remember what matters to them and act on it. Express gratitude sincerely. Be someone they don't have to worry about.
β Avoid this
Treating their acts of care as "just being nice," flirting aggressively too early, or making them feel insecure.
ESTJ β The Executive
ESTJs are attracted to competence, clarity, and someone who has their life together. They're direct and appreciate directness back.
β
Do this
Be clear about your intentions and plans. Show that you're responsible. Dress well and be on time β they notice.
β Avoid this
Being passive, vague, or living without structure. ESTJs can't respect partners who seem to drift through life.
ESFJ β The Consul
ESFJs are warmed by people who are socially graceful, kind to others, and openly expressive about their feelings.
β
Do this
Be warm and engaged in social settings. Compliment them genuinely and often. Express how you feel rather than keeping it ambiguous.
β Avoid this
Being rude to service staff, keeping feelings bottled up, or making them feel like they're "too much."
ISTP β The Virtuoso
ISTPs are attracted to independence and calm confidence. They disengage from drama and clingy behavior immediately.
β
Do this
Do something hands-on together β they connect through shared experience. Give them space without seeming bothered by their quietness.
β Avoid this
Demanding emotional discussions early, seeming needy, or pressuring them to define the relationship before they're ready.
ISFP β The Adventurer
ISFPs are attracted to gentle acceptance. They want to feel completely unjudged before they open up β and when they do, they're fiercely loving.
β
Do this
Notice and appreciate their aesthetic sensibility. Be patient. Create one-on-one experiences rather than group settings early on.
β Avoid this
Criticizing how they spend their time, pressuring them to be more social, or overwhelming them with intensity too quickly.
ESTP β The Entrepreneur
ESTPs are attracted to confident, fun people who can match their energy without needing a lot of hand-holding.
β
Do this
Suggest an activity over coffee β ESTPs fall for people who are up for adventure. Be confident and a little playfully challenging.
β Avoid this
Being overly serious, emotional in the first few interactions, or seeming to need deep emotional commitment before you even know each other.
ESFP β The Entertainer
ESFPs are attracted to people who make them feel special and bring out their joy. They fall fast for genuine enthusiasm.
β
Do this
Be present, engaged, and fun. Tell them directly that you like them β ESFPs appreciate boldness. Do something memorable on the first date.
β Avoid this
Being on your phone, seeming bored, or taking too long to make your feelings clear. ESFPs move on when energy stagnates.